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It’s happened to all of us: You’re chatting with a family member, a friend of a friend at a party, or neighbor when they begin to reveal, perhaps even subtly, that they don’t really buy into—or straight up deny—the existence of human-caused climate change. You’re likely confused and frustrated by the reveal. You look away, as if flashing a concerned look at an imaginary camera like you’re Jim on The Office and think Wait, are they serious?!
“This is a very human reaction,” says Markus Barth, a social psychologist at the Catholic University of Applied Sciences in Cologne, Germany. “You’re obviously convinced that your opinions are true and right, and so every other opinion must, by definition, be wrong.” The problem, adds Barth, is that the person on the other side is in the exact same mindset.
The science is clear: climate change is real, it’s caused by humans, and its impacts are becoming harder to ignore. More than 99.9% of climate scientists back this up. Still, some 14.8% of Americans still deny that it exists. That’s no accident. A mix of misinformation and fossil fuel industry propaganda, along with our own human nature, keeps many in denial.
Accepting the reality of climate change means reassessing everything about the way the world works—and coming to terms with how much adjustment addressing it will require. That’s daunting and can often lead to a big shrug. “We’re really good at letting ourselves off the hook and allowing ourselves not to think about things that have unpleasant implications for us,” says Susan Clayton, a social psychologist at the University of Wooster.
So, how do you have conversations with climate deniers without short-circuiting or subjecting them to a spittle-laced tirade? We can’t promise anything, but there are some tactics to employ to keep your cool and, dare we say, make some progress. It comes down to arming yourself with the right narratives, meeting people where they are, practicing empathy, and trying not to bludgeon anyone with your POV. Here’s what to remember.
Tip #1: Share stories, not just facts
Back in the ’80s, the big idea for encouraging people to participate in climate action was pretty straightforward, says Leaf Van Boven, an environmental psychologist at the University of Colorado–Boulder: Hit ’em with a lot of data. The thinking was that if people had facts, they’d change their minds and adjust their behaviors. That, clearly, didn’t work. In fact, Van Boven has found that the more information and experiences people have, the more divided they tend to become. “People are existing in really different social realities with respect to climate change,” he says. “It also means that not everyone is responding to the increasing evidence in the same way.”
So what’s the alternative? Communicating about the climate crisis needs to be less about facts and figures and more about connecting it to what people truly care about. One of the best ways to do this is through storytelling. You could, for instance, point out how expensive your favorite latte is getting. Or how the trees on your block don’t look as lush as they once did. “Narrative is something that people can relate to, that’s from where they’re from and interesting to them,” adds Barth. “Something that can directly relate to their everyday experience and their everyday life.”
Tip #2: Tailor your approach
The climate crisis touches everything: economics, faith, health, security. Lean into what matters most to the person you’re talking to. This approach might take a little more planning, but Barth says it could be quite effective. “If you are able to prepare a little bit, or understand the other person’s background a little, you can offer them arguments that are best fit to their own background, understanding, worldview,” he says.
If, for example, you’re talking to someone with more conservative views, he suggests leaning more heavily into national security risks or economic impacts of a hotter planet. If the person is religious, conservation may resonate with them.
Tip #3: Stop trying to ‘win’ the conversation
If you approach any discussion with the mindset of Oh, I must prove this person wrong, you’ll likely erode any trust you’ve built, ratchet up the tension, and gain a reputation for being a little difficult. “Conflict research shows us again and again and again that the first thing that gets lost once a conflict starts is feelings of empathy for the other side,” Barth says. “You’re so preoccupied with your own feelings, with your own cognition, with your own thoughts, you really don’t have much room and energy for anything the other person is really telling you or trying to tell you.”
So, what’s a better tactic? Listen. Resist the urge to interrupt, even if you’re slightly screaming inside. People have specific reasons for their beliefs, reminds Barth. Ask questions, and stay curious. The goal is to connect, not win.
Tip #4: Look to the future
As the saying goes: A society grows great when old men plant trees in whose shade they know they shall never sit. One of the biggest reasons so many of us want to do something about the climate crisis is simple: to safeguard the future—of animals and forests, oceans and air, of humankind and the places we love.
Young people tend to be especially passionate about climate action because, well, they’re thinking longer term. Older generations, per the University of Wooster’s Clayton, may take a little bit more to get on board. If you’re talking with an older person about the climate crisis, she suggests asking them about what kind of world they want for their children or grandchildren. This will get them out of a “present-oriented mindset.” One survey found that 77% of respondents are highly concerned about the impact of current environmental policies on future generations.
You can take it a step further and emphasise their own personal legacy, adds Van Boven. For folks that seem like they’re on the cusp of being convinced but still a bit hesitant, he suggests asking them a simple question: How do you want to be remembered: As someone who helped tackle this crisis, or someone who stood in the way? “That can be really, really powerful, because it gives people an additional motivation to connect to what they kind of suspect is likely to be true,” he says.
Tip #5: Don’t be bossy
There’s a lot we can do about the climate crisis as individuals, but if you’re just making headway with someone, don’t jump straight to action. Going into a conversation armed with what seem like helpful tips for addressing the climate emergency may be a recipe for cultivating resistance. Remember: The definition of action will differ from person to person. Not everyone can give up their cars, stop flying, or go vegan.
When people feel like their freedom is being threatened, their brains go into defense mode. Sometimes—okay, pretty often—that can push them into the opposite direction, says Barth. So, feel out the conversation, and if a person is on the fence—or you don’t know them well enough to really understand their point of view—maybe save that pro-train speech or menu of dairy-free milk swaps.
Tip #6: Hold onto hope
Let’s be honest: The climate crisis is scary. Its shadow is long and looms over everything, so fighting it can feel like bailing floodwaters with a thimble. But if conversations linger in the darkness, you run the risk of paralyzing folks or making them think that there’s nothing that can be done—which means you’ll have just traded climate denial for climate doom. “Guilt leads and shame leads, more or less, to wanting to distance yourself from this situation,” says Barth.
The antidote? Lean into hope. Yes, it’s cheesy. And no, you don’t want to fall into toxic positivity. Come armed with stories of hope and success—those that highlight people and communities that have made real change, and prove it’s not too late to take action. Bring up the fact that a small town is using landfill fees to make a huge dent in their waste problem or that countries like Iceland and Nepal are running on almost entirely renewable energy. People don’t want to hear about what’s wrong with the world, notes Barth. They want to know there’s still a chance to make things better.